Saturday, 7 January 2017

La Marseillaise

It was the middle of the night
When the lights were out
And the world was sleeping
When I got up
Stood firm and straight
With arm turned in salute, singing
Arise, children of the Fatherland
The day of glory has arrived!
Against us tyranny’s
Bloody banner is raised.
Just when the song was reaching crescendo
A woman sleeping on my bed
Raised her head in horror
And threw a pillow on my face
Ki  Korcho Tumi?
Paagol  hoye  gaycho  ki?
I am singing the French Anthem
La Marseillaise
But why this anthem, did Robi Thakur write this?
You silly Bongo Santaan, I said
You think all anthems of the word
Were written by Rabindranath
I have learnt the song by heart
For have now made up my mind
And heart to migrate to France.
My tricolor just changed its shades
From Saffron, Green and White
To Blue, Red and White.

Give me one good reason
For you to take this call.
One, I will give you Three
Each one more powerful than the prior
Hearing which you too shall join me
On board the flight to La France.

Firstly tell me what my medical report says
All organs are fit and fine
Just like a lad of eighteen
But for one thing…my little heart
The cholesterol levels are high
How much more can I exercise?
How much more can I control my eating?
Now only one solution remains
And that is to drink wine
Drink wine and be merry
Cleaning my arteries and veins
Where else do you find the best wine,
But in France alone
A hundred miles north of Paris
Lies the wine region of Champagne
Producing the best sparkling white wine
That’ll cure me of my ailment
And they say in France
You open the taps, wine flows.
Her eyes sparkled but her vicious tongue lashed
Gotchha you fool, for wine you want to leave
And what about daab chingri, shorshey eilish
Arsalan Biriyani and Hyderabadi Halim
And choley bhaturey, chaat and gol guppa
Will you get them in France…No Never.
She had a point there
No bread pakora, alu parantha and the rest.
My first argument was put to gastronomic rest.

Second reason for going to France
Will bowl you over My Love
Frenchmen are the sexiest
Frenchmen make more love than any other
And of course the French women
Are so beautiful that you fall in love
With every lass you meet
On plane, beach and every street.
What more do you want in life?
The woman was desperately looking
For a rolling pin or slipper but got none
But threw a volley at me
Don’t get ideas by seeing Vicky Donor
All that crap about Bengali men and their powers
Release …Release..dialogues nesting in your mind
Oh! give me a break please
Are good for movies alone
With a balding head, fading vision and falling teeth
If you think French women are so desperate
To fall for men like you
Remember Carla Bruni loved a President
And you no Sarkozy by a mile
Understand you fifty something baldy aloor dum!

Third reason is the best
And there is no way you can find fault, My Dear
Did you know French laws for work?
Just thirty five hours a week! Yes 35 Only.
Just seven hours a day for just five days
 And here
We work ten to twelve hours everyday
Almost six days a week
Add to it three hours of travel a day
And even after it the phone never stops ringing
The laptop knobs keep tapping
Calls at one in the morning
Mails at midnight…it just goes on and on.
In France you disconnect your phones and laptops
After office hours.
Even if Boss calls
You say ‘ello ‘ello, wrong number Monsieur.
We live a dog’s life here and I say no to it today
I too want my life back
I too want to live again
I too want to give time to
My family, my hobbies and my friends
So Darling, let me go and come with me
To the land of Moulin Rouge, Eiffel and Louvre
Viva La France!!

Passeport Stamped.



  1. What a splendid thoughts you have shared....the love for France and the reasons to do so is impeccable...

  2. Nice thought and nicely played with the words Sir. Aap to Shabdo ke Jadugar ho.
    But Sir I will go by Mam because can't get the Best like daab chingri, shorshey eilish
    Arsalan Biriyani and Hyderabadi Halim
    And choley bhaturey, chaat and gol guppa any where in this world. Go
    East or West or France or any where in this world but my Country is the Best of Best. :)

  3. Oh, I so love the last and the most convincing reason (for me) to migrate to know better :) I would so agree with my co reader Sanjay, you really have a way with words, but please don't migrate.. ;)