I’m Strong, I’m Woman

Mumbai is a very different city when the Rain Gods shower their blessings. It pours and pours and pours. It was a Saturday morning and I was asked to do a simple task that day- go to the telephone exchange and pay the monthly bills. Despite my numerous attempts to convince my wife to go the net banking way, she wouldn’t agree. For her the hard copy of the bill and the stamped receipt meant full and final confirmation that the work had been done completely. Today I got a chance to nag and crib…had you agreed to my suggestion I would be relaxing at home with a cuppa in my hands and not trying to venture out in such weather to make some silly payment. The distance was no more than 500 metres but the whole idea of walking out, getting wet despite the umbrella and the water and muck splashing on to you from the passing vehicles made the thought of it so obnoxious. 

Anyway, as it always is with me and with all the peace loving husbands of the world, it is His Master’s Voice and surely thou shalt comply. Walked out of the house and could feel the dripping water over me from all edges but kept up the march to the telephone exchange. About fifty metres from the exchange saw a woman in early fifties in a black salwar-kameez seeking some help. She wasn’t carrying an umbrella and was waiting under a shade with a folded stick in her hand. I asked her, “Where do you want to go?” She said, “The telephone exchange which is close by.” So I asked her to step in under my small umbrella. Just made sure she was reasonably better covered from the rains than me as I would anyway have to change into dry clothes once back home.

As we entered the telephone exchange gate there were a few steps going down. So I told the woman to be careful and guided her about the steps. She hardly slowed her pace and quickly came down without any hesitation as if she knew every step there. I then asked her, if she too wanted to go to the bill payment counter. “No. I work here. Just walk me a little to the left and there you will find a small staircase leading into a big building. That is the main office block. Just take me to the first step there.” As she crossed a few water puddles with ease, I kept giving her clues, she said, “I know this place very well. Every step is counted and known to me. Just that I forgot bringing my umbrella today. Otherwise I need no help.” As I took her to the appointed place, I asked if I could walk her up the stairs. She unfolded the stick in her hand and said smilingly, “No thank you very much. I will manage from here.” The fat tobacco-chewing guard at the entrance kept sitting for he would have seen the lady manage her way every day without any help.

How strange is life? Here I was with all my limbs and eyes working fine and yet cribbing about the short walk in the rain and there was another woman who was happily going to work, unable to see the road she was walking on, without a cover over her head. How petty of me and how wonderful of this woman who told me to be grateful for what we have. She also told me the oft repeated phrase of Man Strong, Woman Stronger.

A couple of days later I met a colleague from office who told me of another such brave and wonderful woman he had had the honour of meeting. Let me tell you her tale of courage, strength and her fight back ending in glory for self and the country.

She was 29 years old when she was detected with spinal tumour. She went through three spinal tumour surgeries and had 183 stitches between her shoulder blades. Wife of an army man with two children, she survived tumours but was left paralysed waist down. She had two choices- to lead a life of self-pity or to make the best of what life had to offer despite her problems. She decided on the second path.

Life on the wheelchair was not easy. She started undergoing physiotherapy and slowly took to some outdoor activities. She said, “It was pretty depressing in the beginning but love and support of my family made the process easy for me. It made me look at life from a new window.” But she never gave up, just kept on at it. Today she is a legend.

Deepa Mallik is an Arjuna Awardee. She was the first woman to represent the country in paraplegic Olympics. She won a bronze medal in javelin in the London Games and many more medals in the Asian and Commonwealth Meets. She swam in the Yamuna against the current; she drove a motor car 1700 kilometres from down Southern India to the highest motorable road. She is today a motivational speaker and doing her bit for those like her.

Deepa says, disability is only in our thoughts and minds. She convinced me even further, Man Strong, Woman Stronger.

Flipping through some web pages met another woman, Priya Semwal. Surely you haven’t heard of her.

Priya Semwal was studying in first year college when she married an army jawan Amit Sharma in 2006. Amit encouraged her to study and she completed her Masters in Mathematics. Naik Amit Sharma of 14^th Rajput Regiment passed away in 2012 fighting insurgency in hilly Tawang area of Arunachal Pradesh. Amit’s commanding officer, Col. Arun Agarwal suggested to Priya to think of joining the armed forces. Despite initial protests and hesitations from the family, Priya thought it fit to pay her tribute to her husband by joining Officer Training Academy, Chennai and in 2014 joined the Corps of Electrical and Mechanical Engineering (EME) as a commissioned officer. Colonel Arun Agarwal came all the way from the border to witness her passing out parade.

There may be instances of wives of army officers joining the army but Priya is the first wife of a Non-Commissioned Officer to become an officer.

Salute Priya, a wife to a martyred soldier, mother to a four year old Khwaish and a soldier and an officer in the Indian Army. If this is not true valour, then what is?

I am convinced that She is Stronger, Braver, Fitter & of course Smarter than Me. More importantly I learnt about gratitude. Thank Him  and enjoy what you have and stop cursing and worrying about what you don’t. Life is much more than self pity and despondency. 

Go live life to the fullest with what you have.

SS