Que Sera Sera

On my way home from work, I saw the small temple with my favourite God sitting stoutly all alone and the lights switched off. I knew where the pujari kept the key so I took off my shoes and went inside for a talk on things that had been disturbing me for quite some days. He knew me well as I would be passing by almost daily and waving at him, smiling at him, bowing to him and at times dropping my God Services Tax (GST) at the counter.

God Bhai, I am back.

Why again? Go home and enjoy Netflix with her. I too wish to relax after a hectic day.

You, too, watch Netflix?

Yes, why not. I have my Godflix which has all channels and is absolutely free.

Lucky you!

Now that you are here, hope you will not bother me with your silly questions?

Questions I do have, but not silly. These are important and have been keeping me awake at nights.

Listen, can you tell me your questions in brief.

Oh, so now you want me to take off my clothes like a sadhu at Kumbha and speak to you wearing only my brief.

Arrey idiot, not that brief. Just keep this conversation short and your talk to just one liners otherwise you just keep on blabbering so many things at a time, I am unable to understand anything. And for today, just limit your questions to two in line with the two new flicks which have got released. Want to see both OMG and Gadar2 tonight.

Ok. Got it. You teach people that good begets good.

Yes, that’s right. So?

You also say that doing selfless service for humanity will bring you the grace of the Lord.

Correct again. So where’s the confusion?

Sorry to disappoint you but I am not in agreement with your saying that good begets good.

What makes you doubt this time tested saying?

One of my class teachers in school had renounced worldly pleasures and was responsible for transforming the lives of hundreds of students through his work on and off the class room.

Such teachers are now rare.

This man not only helped almost a generation of students in our school, but later went on to train tribal boys and girls in vocational studies to be able to find employment in life.

I must meet such a noble soul. Where can I find him?

I will give you the address where the man lies with tubes coming out of all places in his body and machines to monitor his organs round the clock.

Oh, so now I understand why you are so disturbed.

What happened to your grace God? How did he miss your attention?

I cannot even say that I am not God and can’t do everything but at times my ways are strange and no one size fits all.

So you are still testing my teacher?

Possibly.

Okay, so I get it that he is still not ready to be accepted and must suffer more.

I maintain balance and equilibrium in this world of extremes. Your revered teacher may also have had his share of good fortune in life. Everyone gets their share of good times and bad. No one gets everything all the time.

Why him? There are so many people who are doing wrong things and yet they seem to be prospering and living good lives.

I can understand your anger and frustration so let me qualify my universal saying that good generally begets good.

Sorry God. It may sound bad but in this one case, I beg to differ and can only pray to you to give my teacher an early release from the suffering and pain.

Can we close this conversation here and move on to you your next and final question for the night?

My second question stems from the first one…what happens after?

After what?

I mean once a person attains mukti, how does he reach the gates of heaven or hell?

That’s a silly question.

No, God Bhai, it is not silly. Different religions have different ways of doing the last rites and yet you have always maintained, the end state is the same.

I have not yet got your point.

Let me explain… some are put on pyres and turn to ashes, some are put in coffins and buried beneath the surface and then there are other rituals where you are left to nature to take its course.

Yes, different ways for different religions. So what?

You mean to say the ashes thrown on rivers and lakes, the bones beneath the earth and the carcass out in the open, all find the right path to the two destinations including the ones lying beneath the great pyramids with all the gold and jewellery.

It is the soul that travels and not the ashes and the bones.

And it is you with GPS- God Positioning Services- that guides the souls where to go.

Yes, I do.

And how do you decide who goes where?

It all depends on how you have lived your life here.

So then help me understand this better. Bear with me for once and for this more than a one-liner.

Tathastu

Say two men Jack and John die the same day and are put inside their respective coffins and put beneath the soil by their loved ones. Jack was a good person and lived a good life and did service to the society. John was just the opposite. You mean the souls of the two men will find some secret tunnels and the Oppenheimer powered suction pumps at the two HQs will take them rightfully there.

What is it that you mean by HQs?

Heaven Quarters and Hell Quarters… easy for us who do texting. Yet to find equivalent emojis.

Yes, to what you just explained in your words.

You mean there is no checking again at the gates for Aadhar, Pan and Passports?

No, we are using AI.

What Artificial Intelligence being used by the Gods!

Not artificial intelligence, my friend. That we have left to the human race for they are bereft of Any Intelligence. We are using Actual Intelligence and it works. No one can hack it or seek ransom. We have one code to run it..Que Sera Sera…what will be, will be.

SS