Ode to April Rains and Desires

 

I want to see the Northern lights

I want to watch the sun set on the Grand Canyon

I want to stand atop Machu Pichu

I want to cycle around Amsterdam

I want to walk the streets of Paris

I want to witness the Great Migration

I want to go to Pondicherry with my girls

I want to go for my best friend’s wedding

I want an April rain to come more often

I want to go home

I want to go home without a test

I want to go home without the fear of a false report

I want to breathe without a filter

I want to breathe without using up oxygen

I want to breathe without being conscious

I want to read Bombay Times

I want to read news without numbers

I want to read news, not new guidelines

I want to get a call from an old friend

I want to get a call, not a plea

I want to get a call that I can answer

I want to talk like ‘how are you’ is a formality

I want to laugh at memes without knowing they are true

I want to share a joke without the sliver of cynicism

I want to cut the bad and sew the good

I want to do what I was meant to do

I want to hold the scalpel, not the certificate

I want to sweat from exhaustion, not from a plastic suit

I want to treat, not test

I want to feel the thrill, not search for pulse

I want to give a hug, not face the hate

I want to deliver a drug, not drive a madness

I want to keep the coat white, not wager it in black

I want to ignore the scratch in my throat, it must be from screaming hoarse

I want to know if people heard me, or did the election rally drown it again

I want to see the coverings over nose and mouth, not blindfolds and blinkers

I want to fight what is wrong, not fail with it

I want to dream, not dread

I want to add to my bucket list, not scratch things out

I want to wait for new beginnings, not for an end

But I think I just want to confess

That I am guilty of wanting too much.

(The views expressed are not an individual's but of doctors around the country breaking down under the collapsing healthcare and gross misjudgement of priorities.)

MS

Khote Sikke

The year was 1695. Emperor Aurangzeb was still at the peak of his reign when a self-styled ‘Captain’ Avery captured Ganj-i-Siwa’i, the largest of the Mughal ships. The ship was on its way to Surat carrying not just worshippers returning from a pilgrimage to Mecca but five lakh gold and silver coins, which was the revenue from the sale of Indian goods in the Arab world. Avery first sailed with the hijacked ship to Madagascar and then to the West Indies. A couple of days ago, the Economic Times reported that a handful of the pirate bounty was found in a fruit orchard in rural US. The picture of the Emperor and his coins made me dip into my basket of coins and memories of Khote Sikke.

Since Shah Jahan had emptied the coffers with his opulent constructions all over and what remained was plundered by pirates like Avery, this collector was not left with any coin of the Mughal period. So I flipped the pages of history and found that the Marathas were the true successors of the Mughals with a pan-India presence. Till recently, I believed that I had a coin of the Great Marathas that would fetch me a fortune at the Sotheby’s. This coin is small and heavy and for long I could not read the text. One day, I used the old school tracing technique of putting a white paper on top of the coin and with a pencil rubbed the surface…..slowly the inscription became clear…..Shree Mahdavrao Ma Shinde. A coin of the royal family of Scindia’s! The coin has the emblem of the Gwalior royals in the centre with a cobra coiled above a crossed spear and trident within a circle of beads. Wikipedia also told me that Madho Rao Scindia ruled Gwalior from 1886 to 1925 but what intrigued me was the name taken by the royal scion of Scindias….Alija Bahadur, at a time when the Last Mughal had been deported to Rangoon and the British Empire ruled the country. Mr. Google knows everything so I checked the value of my prized possession and was sadly disappointed to know that it was worth no more than $20….Khota Sikka.

My pouch yielded me some more interesting coins and I shall limit myself to a few. The earliest coins of British India are of George V King Emperor of 1912, a quarter anna and 1916 silver one rupee coin and half rupee of 1946. I was overjoyed to find a one rupee coin minted in 1947 of independent India but the reverse side took away all my joy….there was George VI King Emperor who was still ruling. And, surprisingly, I have coins of newly independent state of Pakistan....1948. The one pice (not paise) coin of 1954 with a prancing stallion is the earliest independent Indian coin in my collection.

One Paise over the ages

Talking of independence, can you see the small coin in the picture above? This is a 1970 coin of Pakistan Sarkar written in Bangla. Bangladesh was not yet born and atrocities there drove millions of refugees into India. One such refugee was a young man in his twenties who had walked into India and managed to reach Calcutta. My father had requested another relative of his there to arrange for a train ticket for the person. Baba, Ma and the three of us went to the Old Delhi Station to receive our guest. He was Nepal da, my father’s nephew from Chittagong. He stayed with us for six months at a time marked with black outs and fears of Pakistani planes bombing Delhi. My mother would take Nepal da out to the markets where she would tell the vendors of the hardships my cousin had to face. Nationalism was at its peak and people readily gave discounts to the poor man on all purchases. My mother also went around her office and colony to collect funds for Nepal da, and when Bangladesh was born, he, reluctantly, went back to his homeland with something to start with. I now realize that it is funny how in one paragraph I have written about the whole sub-continent…India, Pakistan, Bangladesh and Nepal!

Ek Do Teen..

Continuing with 1971, in a government colony in Moti Bagh, a baraat was on its way to the shamianah erected in a playground nearby. There was an air of festivity all around and a group of young lads found their way into the inner circle of where the Jea Band was playing the evergreen tune of Come September and friends and family of the groom were dancing merrily. Someone in the crowd now started showering coins and the boys were waiting for this very moment. They stooped down to pick up every little coin that fell. This activity was fiercely fought by all who wanted a share of the loot. With some coins tightly clenched in my fist, I went home with an air of pride, having won a battle and expecting a hero’s welcome. Instead, I got a dressing down from my mother who explained that the money thrown was for beggars and not meant for me. She even admonished my father for having decided to send me to a Christian missionary school and wasting good money. Despite all the shouts and insults, I kept the coins tightly clenched in my fist….after all it was my hard earned money. When things settled down at home, I slipped under the bed and laid my loot on the floor….small coins of one paisa, two paise, three paise, five paise and one ten paise coin….that was enough to rent myself a couple of hours of bicycle from a nearby shop , much against the wishes of my father.

Attanni Chavanni

It feels nice to see these little coins which may be useless or khote now but used to be priceless in those days of old. I remember the yummy choley kulchas in school canteen would cost twenty-five paise only. Some of us would, on days when the pocket was empty, go to five friends asking for just ‘paanch paise’ claiming to be short by just that much and finally end up with the tasty treat totally funded by unknowing friends. Cold drinks, till much later, were a luxury and a soda bottle with a marble on top was the usual evening drink after a round of football. The fun of pushing the marble down, the sound of the fizz escaping and the sweet taste of the lemonade costing less than a rupee was simply heavenly. A sixty- five paise movie theatre ticket at Archana Cinema in Greater Kailash to watch Guns of Navarone was the fun of growing up when money wasn’t so expensive!

With the coming of the Euro, the European currencies like French Franc, Spanish Pesetas, German Deutsche Marks and Greek Drachma suddenly became khote sikkey. Just the Queen Elizabeth in the centre continues her reign uninterrupted.….Kal Bhi, Aaj Bhi.

And who can forget the 9 pm call of “Mitroooon” on 8^th Nov 2016…. when we were told that our hard earned money had turned black and khote while those who had the black got theirs converted to white and sacche! This was the Demon called Demonetization.

Twenty Twenty

And finally see the twenty paise coin of 1969 and a twenty rupee coin of 2020 lying side by side? The 1969 coin would have surely bought much more than the twenty rupee of today so I propose to the present government to re-introduce the old coin, not just for the value but for the logo in the centre which surely they will find very apt.

SS

Tandav

Standing with one foot on the ground and the other folded to his thigh, eyes closed, hands tightly clasped on his forehead in perfect obeisance, wearing a loin cloth just where it matters the most, the devotee keeps on chanting the Lord’s name for six long days and nights. At last, the Lord of Lords hears his prayers and decides to pay a visit to his bhakt. He is wearing his tiger skin, has a trishul in hand with a dumru attached at the top and a snake coiled round his neck, riding a big black beautiful bull, the Lord is there in person and says…

Bol beta, tujhe kya chahiye.

And the devotee, coming out of a trance, opens his eyes and utters the first wish that comes to his mind….

Prabhu, bachey huye jivan mein mohe virus banayyo!

The Lord is stunned. Having been used to giving riches and lives to his devotees, this indeed is a strange demand. But the Lord has a reputation to keep. He grants every wish anyone asks of him, after all as the Creator, Preserver and Destroyer, he can make anything happen.

Why do you ask for such a wish, vatsa?

Now with his feet firmly on the ground and having sipped some divine drink offered from the kamandulu of the Heavenly Father, the man starts breathing easy and speaks his heart out.

From the time I was born, it was firstly my parents, then teachers at school and college and still later my family and bosses at work, all have asked me to do only good things. Don’t tell lies, don’t steal money, don’t eat sweets, don’t do this, don’t do that…..everyone has just been ruling me by telling me what I should not do and how being good will in turn result in good for me. Now, they find it easier to even quote the scriptures to say, kaam karo par phal ki aasha mat karo…just keep working without expecting anything in return….how nice to listen to, isn’t it? I am tired of being the good Batman all my life, now I wish to play the role of the Joker.

Why should you bring such misery to people? The virus can unleash unstoppable problems to all in the world. The wishes I grant usually make the devotee happy and in turn he brings happiness to me sitting atop the clouds. How will granting of this boon be of any good to me?

Hey Ishwar, the world has become far too evil and men are no longer afraid of anything. They plunder at will, destroy lives and nature and have turned selfish and away from the right path. When I get unleashed, I am sure they will start their daily prayers….prayers for safety and survival. When I am going from place to place, the evil men will stop their nefarious activities as they will be locked indoors. The same people who now bash up doctors and nurses at the smallest pretext, will start respecting them. They will value love and family, they will start becoming believers and start caring for people and nature. I will cleanse this earth of much evil and put the fear of death and misery in their hearts for them to start believing in you, my Lord. So my becoming evil shall bring in a period darkness, and this is when faith shall reignite and the people will change for good.

Mmmm…sounds different and interesting and worth a try. But if given a second choice, vatsa, what would that be?

Bhagwaanji, ‘given’ shabd se yaad aaya….Bachey huey jivan mein  mohe Captain of Ever Given banayyo!

What is that and why would you want to become a captain when I can make you general or even an emperor? I must say, you have some strange requests, unheard of before.

O Lord, you have not heard about Ever Given? It is a huge container ship going from China to the Netherlands. She flies a Panama flag, is owned by a Japanese company, managed by a Taiwanese company with a huge number of desi Indian crew members and gets stuck in the sands of the Suez Canal in Egypt. Then there is a Dutch firm of salvors who try to float it again and an English firm of Average Adjusters. It is almost like the universe in one place.

Courtesy Internet

So why would you want to be the captain of an ill-fated ship when you could have asked me to make you the owner of the most luxurious yacht or commander of world’s largest aircraft carrier?

Just think of what I can achieve…I will bring the world shipping through the busiest route carrying 12% of global trade to a grinding halt. Every day it will cost the world over $9 billion. Logistics and scheduling will go haywire and trade will initially slow down. My counterparts, sailing on other ships, will simultaneously block the other navigation channels like the Panama Canal, Bosphoros Strait, Malacca Straits….trade on the high seas will then get stalled completely.

What good will this do to you?

Hey Devon ke Dev, when trade will stall, the rich and powerful economies of the world will come down on their knees and that is when I shall strike a deal with them.

And what deal will this be, may I know please?

I will negotiate a deal on insurance and marine Insurance in particular because that is what I have done in the last thirty three years of my existence.

Mmmm…what is this insurance?

Sirji, Bima….protection against any damage.

I am aware of only Bheema and he was the protector of the Padavas against any damage by Kauravas. Yeh Bima kya cheez hai, vatsa?

My Good Lord, I will explain the principles and practice of marine insurance at another time but for now you must listen to my demand that I shall lay before the world economies. “Go and correct the marine premium rates with immediate effect.” You see the rates currently are so cheap, it is almost free. The marine insurers are a group of people fighting for their survival but each one of them outdoing the other in being reckless and wild and then there are these insurance brokers and clients who make them dance to their tune. This demand, if met, would mean survival of this small breed of people called Marine Underwriters. But if the demand is not met, as Captain of Ever Given and my fellow captains across the seas, we will ensure our ships remain grounded in the sands and do not move an inch. Bada mazza ayega Bhagwaan.Samudra manthan ek baar phir hoga. If this change does not happen, there will be many more bloggers like me on the internet with nothing better to do.

The Lord of Lords gets furious and starts his Tandav…the cosmic dance….first slowly and then goes into a trance. The dumru starts playing to the tune, the trishul starts tapping on the floor in rhythm and the snake starts moving in a beautiful pose with its head held high and wrapping its slim body around the Lord. The bull also tries to take a leaf out of the dancing scene but just can’t keep pace or the poise. After a while the Lord speaks up aloud…

Are you testing me, vatsa? I am now getting angry at the requests you are making. Is there something normal you can ask and I can easily give? This is your third and last call. If this, too, is as weird, then you can stand on one leg for the rest of your life and I shall not return ever. Confuse kar diya tuney! Dimaag ka dahi ho gaya!!

Sorry Bhagwaan. Let me ask you one last time and this time I will not disappoint you.

Ok…Bolo beta!

Bachey huey jivan mein mohe corrupted EVM banayyo!

Dear Lord, I want you to help me tamper with all the EVMs in this country. Just in case you do not know what EVM is, it is the Electronic Voting Machines that are used to cast votes and elect people to the so called democratic institutions like Sansad, Vidhaan Sabha and Vidhan Parishads. With your help, I will make sure in all elections, no matter what button people press, the end result will be NOTA which would mean that None Of The Above candidates get the mandate.

This sounds doable but what will it serve.

Prabhu, most of the people in the election fray are liars, corrupt and work only to fill their own coffers and those of their near and dear ones. They manipulate the system to rule and serve no one but themselves. They make people fight one against the other and in the last seventy five years have done more plunder than the colonists did in the previous two hundred years. Look at the state we find our country today. No one can feel proud and happy where we have landed ourselves, thanks to this breed called Politicians. You may then counter me by asking, who will run the country. To that I want to state, this country runs on Bhagwaan bharose even now, it will be no worse. Just repeating what someone called the Mahatma, whom people of this country have forgotten or subject him to ridicule, said in 1942 while launching the Quit India Movement…

“Leave India to Gods. If this is too much, then leave her to anarchy.”

Tathastu, vatsa!

SS

Every Dog Has His Day

Dusk was falling. We were slowly making our way back from the forest. Much to our sadness, the jungle safari was coming to an end for the day. We still had the choice of another jeep safari or a Kabini River cruise the next morning. As our jeep was winding its way out of the forest, we passed two tribal women carrying bunches of dried grass and twigs on their heads. A little ahead, we saw a young boy walking past, hitting a stone with a stick, as he made his way back home. A lone dog followed him. We realized we were getting close to a tribal village just on the outskirts of the forest. We could discern a few huts some distance away, the last few in a clump, perilously close to the forest.  We were about to exit the Nagarhole Tiger Reserve. Suddenly, the driver of jeep braked, and our vehicle came to an abrupt halt. The guide did not have to say anything. Leaping across the jungle path, right in front of the windscreen, was an adult leopard.

The guide whispered, “He is after the dog”. The poor soul was about to fall prey to the big cat! But we were thrilled, excited at having seen the famed Indian Leopard of the Nagerhole National Park. The guide, just a little while back, had told us that we were lucky to have seen two of the four major predators most commonly sighted in that region, the golden jackal and the Asiatic wild dog or dhole. However, the other two were the big cats, the tiger and the leopard, which had eluded us so far. He had added that they were probably waiting for us to come back another day.

Photograph of Dholes taken on a foggy morning

As the spotted big cat leapt in front of our jeep, chasing the poor dog, we were struck by its speed and powerful muscles despite its small size. At least, in my mind, I had imagined the leopard to be much bigger. In reality, leopards are short, powerful and stocky with their unmissable long tails. The guide later told us it was an adult male. In the flash of a second it had disappeared into the adjoining bushes where the little dog had disappeared too. For a moment, we were relieved it wasn’t one of the women or the young boy.

As suddenly as the leopard had appeared and disappeared, we heard the screeching cries of the dholes from behind the bushes and also a long yelp, as our friend, the village dog, made his final dash for life. Our guide, who was sitting next to me, whispered softly, “The pack has come”.  He had told us earlier how ferocious and deadly could a pack of dholes be. The next instant, all eight of us in the jeep, saw a sight that seemed to have emerged straight from a Nat Geo episode. We could see the leopard climbing up a tall tree, about ten meters or so from our jeep. By this time, our companions, who were armed with cameras, got busy, while the rest of us just watched, mesmerized, unable to even breathe. The dholes could not be seen in the dense undergrowth of bushes and small trees but we could hear them. The guide softly said, “They are at the bottom of the tree.” By this time, our spotted friend had climbed to the highest branch. No other human being could be seen now. Living on the edge of the forest the villagers had eyes and ears as keen as those of the chital or sambar. The next jeep had arrived and stopped a little way behind us but they had already missed the chase, the escape and the climb. We could all see the leopard crouching on one of the top branches. The village dog had escaped by a whisker, and by a sudden twist of fate, the hunter had become the hunted!

The Hunter becomes the Hunted

The sun was going down fast; only a portion of it could be seen at the horizon. The driver said we would have to make our way out of the forest as it would no longer be safe to linger. We had already stayed beyond the stretchable limits. As he started the jeep, we saw the leopard holding on to his life on one of the topmost branches, while the dholes,  whom we could not see but had only heard, continued to  circle the bottom of the tree.

Crested Hawk Eagle

As we emerged from the forest leaving behind the silver oaks, the teaks, the rosewood and the sandalwood trees to stand witness to infinite tales of the hunter and hunted, of death and deliverance, of survival and narrow escapes, I could not help thinking about the fate of our protagonists. The secrets of the forest would, forever, remain hidden in mystery of the all encompassing darkness which would soon take over. The forest lives by its own laws and all its habitants have to live by them but, as in the human world, Fate or Chance does get to intervene. How long did the leopard remain perched up there? Did the dholes continue to wait for him to leap off the branch and escape with incomparable speed or did the leopard slink away in the all pervading darkness of the night or did the pack simply lose patience and give up on its prey? The end will never be known. I leave it to the imagination of my readers.

Our convoy of jeeps slowly made their way back our lodges by the river Kabini. The flora and fauna had kept us enchanted throughout the three-hour evening and next morning safaris. The Kabini River separates the Bandipur and Nagarhole National Parks. They are a part of the Nilgiri Biosphere Reserve. Apart from the predators already mentioned, it is also the home to some more like the famed but elusive black panther and the striped hyenas. We had got a chance to come across a host of herbivores like the sambars, chitals, four-horned antelopes, gaurs or the Indian Bisons, wild boars and not to forget the Asiatic elephants. We saw herds of elephants moving around, playing in the dust, making their way to the river and even taking a dip in the cool waters. Birds and beasts beautifully camouflaged in their natural surroundings, the forest echoing and coming to life in the wee hours of the mornings or at dusk with their calls, birdsongs, hoots and tweets. Spotting them on the tree branches or the jungle pathways were the highlights of these safaris- the gray langurs, the macaques, the mongoose, the Malabar Giant Squirrel and the Indian Monitor Lizard. Whether it was a river cruise or a jeep safari, it would open up a beautiful world of rare species of birds like the cormorants, drongos, crested hawk- eagles, herons, ospreys , serpent eagle, hill mynas, and of course, the ever colourful kingfishers and parakeets . No ride through a forest was ever complete without seeing the herds of spotted deer, as they nestled together, eyes in all directions, ever alert and ready to take off at the slightest sound or sign of danger.                          

Perhaps the two images I will carry with me forever are that of the cormorant sitting on a dead tree in the midst of the placid waters of the river Kabini against the setting sun and the other is that of a deadly predator hanging on to a branch of a tree for his life while a pack of another predator decides his fate. Perhaps they both sum up the inevitability of death and the precariousness of life.

DS

Amazonia...For Sofia!

The story so far…. In a chance occurrence, Princess Sofia meets a girl from the forest, Lily. The two become instant friends enjoying each other’s company playing hopscotch, drinking water from the stream and climbing a tree along with Lily’s three friends- Kaku, the bear, Chhotu, the doggie and Bahadur, the owl. When Sofia does not return to the forest for days, Lily and her friends go to the palace with the help of her gardener father in search and realize that the princess may be in trouble. (https://punctuationsandmore.blogspot.com/2021/03/once-upon-time.html)

The story continues…Lily and friends walked back to the forest without uttering a single word. They climbed their Jamun tree and started talking about things running in their tiny heads…where was Sofia…who was this giant with a sword…why was the Queen crying…what can we do….and then there was an element of doubt whether they should, at all, get into this mess for someone who they had met just once…..? Undaunted and putting all doubts to rest, Lily raised her fist and Kaku, Bahadur and Chhotu joined her as they shouted once more…For Sofia!

“We first need to find out more about what is the real situation at the palace and then we can think of doing something to solve the mystery. Bahadur, this is where we need you.”

Bahadur felt happy at being given such importance…"Yes Lily, Bahadur, the Brave Heart, at your service. Tell me what can this humble but brave Ullu do.”

“You need to get a large number of your friends together and at nightfall fly into every window in the palace to search for Sofia. With your super night vision eyes and sharp ears, you are our best bet. Silently observe everything, and relay the news back to us. Since your intelligence is high but memory short, you will need to organize your friends to sit on every tree available from the palace to the forest passing on the news from one owl to another. Your grandfather, Bada Ullu, may be asked to sit with us here to translate the tweets. Mind it, the work is dangerous as the enemy inside may attack you and your brethren and if the situation gets out of hand, send out an SOS (Save Owl Service) and abandon the mission. The safety of our friends is our main concern.”

“Well understood, Lily. You can definitely count on us ullus to live up to their reputation of dependability, intelligence and bravery.”

While waiting for Bahadur and friends to send the messages, Lily and her two friends felt hungry. Lily went to her mother who had prepared good food for all which she packed in boxes and went up the tree to eat together with her friends. It was now late in the night when the first tweets started coming. Bada Ullu started translating them logically.

Tweet tweet tweet…the giant with one arm, one eye and a foul mouth is sitting on the throne…

Tweet tweet tweet….the king and the queen have been locked up in the dungeon…

Tweet tweet tweet…there are many heavily armed soldiers dancing and singing behind the palace…

Tweet tweet tweet…Princess Sofia is found in a big hall crying with a dirty looking woman around…

Tweet tweet tweet…Bahadur met Sofia but the bad woman attacked him with a stick that emits fire….

Tweet tweet tweet…Bahadur is safe and flying back with the Owl Brigade….Mission Accomplished!

In some time, Bahadur returned to a hero’s welcome and a pot of the best rice pudding. It was past midnight and so the friends decided to retire and agreed to meet again next morning to plan Sofia’s rescue. Lily went to her father’s room to wish him good night. She saw her father kneeling before a big chest with his head touching the knob on it and uttering what seemed a prayer in a  strange language. She waited for him to complete his act and then went straight ahead and jumped onto the chest and asked, “ Daddy, what were you doing and what is in this chest?” Father tried to avoid the questions but the persistence of the little one was rock solid and he finally picked her up in his arms and flung open the lid of the chest. Lily’s eyes popped out when she looked inside to find the armour of a soldier, a straight long sword and a helmet with a gold coin in the front side, all kept neatly. She looked at him in awe and with her eyes asked questions to which he replied, one by one.

“I was a general in King Behroz’s army and fought many a war defending the kingdom. One day, a couple of years before you were born, we got the news that a Hongol Chief Ustinov was planning to invade our kingdom. I led a contingent of troops to stop their advance through the mountain passes of Hindu Kush. We were ambushed there by the Hongols but our soldiers fought bravely and almost defeated the enemy. I fought their leader Ustinov in a fierce combat and he was badly injured. He was left with one eye and one hand when he begged for mercy. Taking pity, I let him go. King Behroz got angry at me and stripped me off my post. I was to be executed for treason when the good Queen Eliana stepped in and pardoned me and then allowed me to work as a gardener in the palace.”

“Daddy, the Hongol Chief Ustinov is back. The evil man is back in our kingdom and has taken control of the palace, imprisoned the king, the queen and my friend Princess Sofia.”

And Lily then narrated her story about her one day friendship and the news from the palace as told by the Bada Ullu and Bahadur’s friends.

The sun was peeping out of the dark clouds and Lily’s friends were back.

“Dad, we need to do something. Why don’t you call for your soldiers to help us? Surely they can defeat Ustinov and his Hongols once again.”

“No Lily. My key commanders were also stripped off their ranks. I could call for them but what good can ten men do against an army of blood thirsty Hongols who will be no less than ten thousand. And let me also tell you something about Ustinov and his forces. They fight in an organized manner. Their archers first fire hundreds and thousands of arrows to destroy their enemies over a distance. Then their cavalry comes forward and chops off everything that comes their way. Ustinov himself is a great fighter and his main strength lies in a Witch Kila who drinks the blood of hundred animals every day and has supernatural powers. Ustinov cannot be beaten unless someone defeats the evil witch. We have no time to muster up an army to fight. These Hongols have a schedule to do things. Tomorrow will be their day number three here and on this day, they will do a public execution of the royal family, and then send the army to slaughter all the people of this kingdom including us before plundering all the riches here and returning to their land in the mountains for the winters.”

“Daddy, if we are all going to be killed tomorrow anyway, don’t you think we should give a fight before we go down? You get your commanders together and we will try and muster all our friends of the forest before dawn.”

Lily and her friends walked out of the house and sat under the jamun tree. The father, General Shahbaaz, looked in amazement at his little daughter and blew his horn which had a peculiar sound. Surely his commanders would be the only ones who would understand the meaning of the clarion call to once again take up arms in the service of their beloved General.

“We have no time to lose. Chhotu, you have to go to Sheru, Baghera and other fighters and tell them to bring all their folks before tomorrow morning. Tell them, this is not just a fight for Sofia but for their own existence as they, too, will meet the same fate as ours at the hands of the evil Hongols. The cats, the dogs, the bears, the elephants, all must forget their enmity and join forces for this one cause.”

“Bahadur, you have to get all our eagles, hawks, kites, vultures….. The Hongols have people and animals on land but we can surprise them from the air. The pigeons, sparrows and owls must be here tonight. We have a special work for them before tomorrow’s fight for survival.”

“Kaku, you have a special task.” And she spoke silently into his big ears hearing which the bear started giggling. 'Yes..yes…this will be good. I can get this done. And what will you do Lily?"

“I am going deep into the forest to meet Bon Bibi, the Protector of the Forest. If she joins us, she can not only galvanize our army but she is the only one who can neutralize the witch, who must be beaten, if the Chief Ustinov has to be defeated.”

Bon Bibi: Courtesy Internet

All the friends went in different directions to muster up Amazonia, the army of the forest. By evening, the friends met again and each one of them confirmed that their missions had been successful. As the palace lights went out for the night, a flotilla of tiny birds and owls flew in the dark sky. They entered the palace through the windows and grilles and under the careful supervision of Bahadur and his owls, dropped drops of honey on the quivers and bows of soldiers lying in the armoury and flew back.

Trumpets blew aloud next morning from the palace announcing the big execution day of the royals and the Hongol soldiers wore their armour as it would also be their big day of killing and looting.  A golden chariot drove out of the palace gates and in it were Chief Ustinov and the Witch Kila, waving wildly to the victorious soldiers. The moment Ustinov stepped out, his sight fell on a group of soldiers standing at the distance waving their glittering swords at him. Ustinov pulled out a long viewing apparatus and saw General Shahbaaz and some ten odd men.

“Soldiers, this will be the day when we will have even more fun. We have an army of ten people out there waiting to fight us….ha ha ha…ten men against our ten thousand….ha ha ha!! Just leave their leader alive for I want to kill him with my own bare hands….want revenge for the earlier defeat.”

When Ustinov again looked through the viewing apparatus, he saw a huge army of ferocious animals of all shapes and sizes standing behind the ten soldiers. Each one was growling and ready to charge.

“This will be a funny war fighting against animals….Archers get ready to fire….Cavalrymen on your horses and charge with all your power to crush the enemy to smithereens.”

The archers bent down on their knees and took out their arrows from the quivers and took air but before a single shot could be shot, the sky went dark…..completely dark. All the Mongols heard was a buzzing sound that got louder by the second and suddenly the archers were under the attack by millions of bees. Kaku and his bear friends had stolen their honey and later told the bees that their precious stuff had been taken away by the Hongols, who drank pots of honey. The bees could themselves find honey on their armour as proof. The sting of the bees was so devastating that the archers fled the battlefield in no time leaving behind their bows and arrows.

As the forest army started their march towards the palace, the sky again became dark. This time it was not the bees but the birds of war that had taken to the sky and were flying fast in a group formation towards the Hongol cavalry. No sooner had they reached a point, that the group broke up into three teams….eagles going straight, the hawks going to the right and vultures to the left and in one moment of clockwork precision, all swooped down in a majestic fashion and dropped snakes and scorpions held in their claws over the horses and the men atop them. The horses started breaking the ranks as the deadly snakes thrust their venom. The soldiers fell down and many were trampled as the horses ran away leaving the terrified infantry men all alone to fight the charging forces of Amazonia.

The forest army was now no more than a hundred yards away when Ustinov and Kila realized that they had been beaten. The witch now took out her wand and with a circular motion of her wand…swoosh…a circle of fire was sent towards the oncoming animals. The animals froze in their tracks and a fear ran into their hearts….was this going to be their end….but before the circle of fire touched them, a deluge of cold water dropped from the clouds above and drowsed the fire. Bon Bibi, riding her tiger, charged towards the Witch Kila and the forest army ran along with her to demolish what remained of the great Hongol army. General Shahbaaz and his brave soldiers, too, joined the hand to hand fight and cornered Ustinov. Kila unleashed her next weapon of poison gas that blew towards the animals, Bon Bibi opened her mouth wide and sucked in the poisonous air…Kila was no match for the Protector of the Forest.

While this battle was going on, Lily and her three little friends ran into the palace. With Bahadur guiding them, they reached the dungeon where they found no one guarding it with the keys lying on the floor. They opened the door and released King Behroz and Queen Eliana. They then went to the hall where Princess Sofia was imprisoned and the guard standing outside was no match for King Behroz who easily knocked off his head in no time with one swift move. The royal family held each other tight and started crying in joy.

By now the fight on the outside was over and General Shahbaaz and Bon Bibi walked into the palace with their huge victorious forest army and had the evil Kila and Ustinov in chains. King Behroz reinstated Shahbaaz with a tap of his sword and made him the Commander in Chief of the Kingdom. Queen Eliana decreed, “From this day onwards, no royal would ever go on a hunt and kill any animal or bird. The trees of the forest will never be cut down.” Ustinov and Kila were punished with imprisonment for life in a remote island from where they would never be able to come back. Bon Bibi returned to the forest with the animals and birds.

The next day, the palace erupted in celebrations. There were festivities everywhere. Kaku, Bahadur and Chhotu ate all the cakes and puddings they ever wanted while Sofia went barefoot with Lily to the forest to play hopscotch, hide and seek, dived into the stream without any fear of the fish and frogs and enjoyed the jamun and other berries straight from the trees.

And they lived happily ever after.

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Once Upon a Time

My story telling started with my daughter turning two and then her insatiable hunger for stories kept me weaving tales that would go on and on. Telling stories while taking her to her school bus stop and while putting her to bed were mandatory and often these stories would be like the Hindi soaps that continued one day after another. In some of them, I would include her and her friends as key characters, while in some others, her childhood idols Salman Khan (Sallu) and Rahul Dravid (Laahul) would appear to make the stories even more exciting. This time, I have once again tried telling a similar story but one that does not end. Some of you will find it childish, but if some of you find it worth their time and want to know more and the tale to wag more….I will try and continue again later. So this one is for all the little girls out there who still have the time to listen to simple tales.

A golden carriage pulled by two black majestic stallions was passing through the woods with a little princess watching and admiring the beauty outside from the window. The princess wore a pretty pink dress made of finest silk and had a small tiara on her head. The carriage was guarded by another six horsemen in their traditional uniform worn by soldiers with shining swords dangling from their waist. As the carriage passed an empty space of green flat land, the princess shouted, “Stop! I said stop!” and the carriage came to a halt. The princess knocked at the window and one of the guards jumped off his horse and opened the carriage door. The princess walked down the steps and went towards another little girl playing hopscotch alone. The little girl wore a simple dress with green and blue flowers printed on it and had her hair flying all across and she continued singing softly a song and continued playing without even bothering to look at the onlooker. She seemed quite good at the game and went from one box to another till she threw the marker slightly hard and it landed next to the princess.

Source: Pinterest

“Can I play with you?”

“Yes, you can but since you came late, I will go first.”

The princess nodded her head in agreement and waited patiently for her turn as her guards also came down their mounts and sat on the green grass enjoying these moments of fun as the royalty began playing with the commoner.  As long as no one saw the sight, they felt it was alright and safe. After a while, the princess got her chance to play. She went to one end of the court and gently threw the marker to the first rectangle and then on one leg hopped from one box to another. She had hardly done a few steps when she fell down on the court. The guards rushed in to pick her but she stopped them with a show of her hand….”No, I can get up myself. “

The other girl started laughing….started with a little giggle and went on to a loud uncontrollable laughter. The princess initially felt embarrassed but then joined the other girl in laughing and again with a gesture of her hand asked, “Why are you laughing?”

“How can you play hopscotch wearing a high heel shoe? Take it off and then play.”

The princess, a little unwillingly, took off her shoes and stockings and as she put her feet on the earth beneath, something she had never done in all her years of existence, she felt a few sharp pebbles hurting her skin.  But she did not show any pain and started playing the game again. This time, she did not stumble even once and the two girls played together for long. For once the princess began to enjoy the dust on her feet and now she did not feel any pain beneath her sole. The laughter of the two little girls dimmed the chirping of the birds that day in the forest.

“Let us rest a while.”

“Ok. Are you thirsty?”

“Yes and I have water and fresh juice in my carriage. Shall I get some for you?”

“No, I don’t need that. There is a stream nearby and if you want we can go and drink the cold clean water from it.”

“Oh…that would be fun….let’s go.”

And off they ran together holding each other’s hands with the guards behind trying to keep pace with them. In some time, the children found themselves beside a free flowing stream and the little girl in the flowery dress walked into the water, bent down and with her little hands folded like a cup picked some water and drank it.

“Come, walk into the stream and drink the way I am doing it.”

The princess seemed to enjoy this new life and without wasting any time, did as was told and now felt the cold water on her tiny feet….mmmm…. she liked it and her smile said it all. She too bent down to pick up water and suddenly a big green frog jumped out of the water…..the shocked princess lost her balance and …..splaash….she found herself in the water. She loved the feel of the cold water and started laughing and it started a roar of laughter from all her guards who were beginning to enjoy the break from the routine carriage ride. Sitting in the water, the princess saw the tiny fish swimming there….coming close to her and just when she tried to catch, they turned away leaving her empty handed. She did not mind when the other girl threw water at her. The feel of the cool fresh water on her cheeks and hair felt heavenly. This bath was surely much better than the small warm water pool at the palace with rose petals spread in it.

The two kids sat on the bank of the stream and after a while lay down basking in the sun.

“What is your name?”

“I am Sofia. I live in the palace and my father is the king. My mother is from another land whose capital is Sofia and so she named me. What about you?”

“I am Lily and my father is a gardener in the palace and my mother is at home cooking all day long. We live in this forest area and I know every tree, bird and animal….they are my friends and keep me company. But I have three special friends. Come let me show you.”

The two girls walked a while and stopped near a big tree with branches spread far and wide. The little girl put her hands in the shape of a microphone and made a funny noise….woo hoohoo…woo hoohoo…and in no time footsteps were heard and in came a small brown doggie and a baby brown bear.

“That is Chhotu my little doggie and the other is Kaku my brave bear cub. Hey where is Bahadur?”

From up above the tree came a shrill note and the two girls looked up to see a big white owl sitting on one branch…it flew down and sat on Lily’s shoulder.

The princess was thrilled.

“These are your best friends. How lovely! Can I also become your friend and come to play everyday with you and with them?”

“Yes, you may but there is one condition. You must get some good food for my friends. They think there is plenty of good food in the palace and sometimes think of sneaking inside to eat but my father has warned them that if they are caught, they will be put in the prison and even have their heads chopped off. So they have to eat what my mother cooks and what they get in the forest.”

“Great! I will get big baskets for you all every day. So now we are friends?”

“Yes…friends.”

The doggie wagged his tail, the bear did a quick somersault and the owl fluttered her wings to fly onto the shoulder of the princess, allowing her to gently caress her bald head.

“Are you hungry?”

“Yes somewhat but I need to go home. Mother will be worried as I should have been home long ago.”

“Ok you can go. We are going to enjoy some fresh berries.”

As the princess turned to walk towards her carriage, she saw Lily and her friends climbing the tree. She turned around and ran towards the tree. She tried to climb but failed. The guards came close to her and decided to form a small circle and planned to hoist Princess Sofia up the branch where Lily and her friends were sitting. But Sofia refused their help.

“You cannot climb in that dress of yours. Take it off!”

Sofia got the message and snapped off her silken dress and was now in her white chemise. She slowly made her way up the tree and by the time she sat down with others on the branch, she had a number of bruises on her knee and thigh but she did not feel any pain. She was overjoyed at her achievement, at her new found friends and at her living a new life full of fun and adventure. Kaku was an expert climber and bent down branches with lots of berries on them and the friends ate till they felt full. After a while they climbed down the tree and the princess managed to get back into her beautiful dress which had become crumpled, picked up her shoes in her hands and went into the carriage. She waved to Lily and her three friends wildly and shouted….”Will come back tomorrow, same time!”

Lily and her friends waited for the princess the next day. She did not turn up.

They again came at the same time the next day and again Sofia did not come.

The third day, they decided to go to the palace. Since Lily’s father was the gardener in the palace, they were able to go inside. They waited in the palace gardens but there was no sign of Princess Sofia. Lily took courage and walked towards the palace entry where the guard stopped her.

“Go away from here. This is a royal palace, don’t you know?”

“I have come to meet my friend Sofia. Can you please call her down?”

“How dare you call the princess by her name! Go away now before I beat you up.”

Lily went back to the garden and shook her head in disappointment. The three friends understood the sign. But Bahadur decided it was time to do some flying check and went off in search.  He was back in no time and informed others, “There is something wrong in the palace. I could hear see a woman who looked like the queen crying on the shoulder of a man with crown on his head. The man must be the king, Sofia’s father and then there was this ugly looking giant of a man who had his sword out of the scabbard and making threatening advances towards the couple. Sofia is nowhere to be seen. I think our friend is in trouble and time for us to do a rescue act.”

“Are you ready?”

“Yes! Yes!! For Lily…For Sofia”…the three friends shouted in unison.

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Aahista Aahista

Source: Internet- Pinterest

It was not long ago that we prayed to be at home and work from there. The long and painful travel to and from office would take away a minimum of three good hours from the day. Often, I would tell my friends that all those who had their homes close to offices in large metros like Mumbai and Delhi, were the happiest people for they could spend an extra hour at home with their families, an extra hour at work impressing the bosses and an hour to themselves doing things they loved like reading, playing and enjoying music. But the year gone by with its WFH has been an eye opener as this seems to a much more exhausting experience than the drudgery of daily travel of the past. You do not need the Big Four consulting companies to tell you the real reason for this burnout phenomenon among workers…..it is the speed that no longer thrills but kills. You may have sent a mail to your team and in no time your mail box starts flooding with clarifications and answers. Everyone is online 24X7 and responding sitting on commodes, running in the gym and I will not be surprised that they may be typing on mobiles, iPads and laptops even while making love.  The same thing happens when someone has sent you a mail, they seek the response instantly. If it is a complaint, even before you have realized, the person has already written to your Managing Director and is threatening to write to the Regulator. Some have gone even smarter by using the Twitter and other social media available to get their job done pronto. In short, there is no time to breathe, which implies you are exhausted. I long for days when things took some time…Aahista Aahista.

Let me transport you about thirty- three years back in time and tell you how it was then.

Office Office: One Act Play

Dramatis Personae:

Ram, the Record Clerk. He is one of the most important men in the office who keeps all the correspondence in a chronological and methodical manner. All letters have a date stamp and signature of the RC.

Somnath, the Typist. This man with a thick moustache is available infrequently at his desk as he is also a ‘neta’ in the trade union for clerical staff.

Gautam Bose, the mid-level Technical Officer. He is always smartly dressed in a tie and full-sleeved shirt and carries his neat briefcase to work daily.

Alok Sanyal, the Boss. He is the Department Head and claims to be more knowledgeable than anyone on planet earth. He is known to write long and flowery letters and has a caustic tongue.

Joy, the Intern. He is a direct recruit officer (in those days there used to be such a sub-specie), who has been given his first posting at the Head Office of an insurance company in Kolkata. He knows little, wants to know even less and is here just by chance. Till a few months back he was asked to only read only files full of copies of letters written by the Gautam da and the Ultimate Boss just to understand the art of writing office communication. The poor fellow would almost sleep reading the boring stuff but kept a smiling face lest the bosses were offended. Now, after three months, he has been assigned proper work like seeing claim files.

Scene I: Ram Babu puts a letter dated 13^th September 1988 before the intern on his table even before he arrives for work. The intern sees the letter, reads carefully. Someone has complained to the Chairman- cum- Managing Director of the company about a claim for sinking of a fishing vessel that had got inordinately delayed. The intern picks up his pen and writes on the blank space on the left hand side, “Ram file please”, and gives it to Ram and carries on with the other work on his table.

Scene 2: After a couple of weeks, the complainant writes again to the CMD asking about the claim and writes in bold, capital letters…Reminder 1 dated 15^th October 1988. Hell breaks loose! The CMD calls the General Manager asking him about the fate of the earlier letter. The GM in turn calls Alok Sanyal and fires him for not attending to the earlier complaint letter. A furious Alok Boss calls for Gautam Bose and the intern to his cabin. The latter is made to hear every possible verbal abuse in proper Queen’s English. Finally, he shouts in his mother tongue…Chitthi ta kothai? (Where is the letter?).

The intern asks Ram Babu for the letter. Ram quickly connects it to the subject matter and previous reference number and date and brings out the claim file where the letter has been filed properly.

The intern is made to carry the file and the Boss takes him into the CMD’s room to tell him who the culprit really is.

The CMD calmly asks, “Why did you file the previous letter?”

The intern softly says, “Sir, the letter was addressed to you and you wrote- GM, please attend. The GM then wrote on the letter- Manager, file please. The Manager wrote- Gautam, file please. Gautam da wrote, Joy, file please and I thought that if all of you, who had read the same letter, could write, file please, I being the junior-most officer should, similarly, write similarly- Ram, file please and our RC Ram dutifully filed it away.”

The CMD’s anger gives way to a giggle listening to the young man. “Will you now send a letter to the complainant and attend to the ‘file’ please?”

Yes, Sir.

Boss asks the intern to draft a letter which he will sign and send to the claimant.

Scene 3: The intern now opens the claim file which speaks for itself. He sees that the papers had been received in the office on 5^th June 1988 and on 14^th July a letter was sent to the Regional Office asking for additional documents and clarifications. Some documents had come on 30^th of July and the intern had again asked for some more clarifications and documents. These too had come by 10^th August. All this time, the intern did not do anything and just kept back the file and papers in the record room. Before taking the file to the CMD, he smartly removes the last covering letter from the regional office so that anyone seeing the file will blame RO for not doing their work and the root cause of the delay will, thus, lie with them and not our man. This was quite a common practice and if the lower office said they had sent the documents, all you had to say was, Sorry, we have not received, send it again and, thereby, you got another fortnight to reply.

The intern writes a hand written letter and takes it to Somnath to type. He then takes the draft letter to the Boss. The Boss edits almost everything in the letter except possibly an ‘is’ here and an ‘as’ there, a ‘this’ and a ‘that’ somewhere….rest is all his own language. The intern often questioned his knowledge of the language which he had learnt for years together in his Catholic School from the Irish Missionaries. He would, often, joke with his friends after office, Tujhe pata hai mera Boss kaun hai….Mera Boss, Wren and Martin ka Baap hai!

The intern then takes the edited letter to Somnath and requests him to type it again. Somnath asks him to keep the draft on his table and that he will do it in the evening as he has a union meeting to attend.

Scene 4: Next day, Somnath arrives and types the letter and the intern again sends it to his Boss to sign. The letter again comes back with a few more changes. The intern takes it to Somnath who simply says, “Na, korbo na! (No, won’t do it!). We are not fools doing the same letter ten times…and he throws the letter off his table. The intern decides not create a scene and goes away. After a while, he goes down to the nearby cigarette shop where Somnath is enjoying his smoke with his friends. Again, the intern requests Somanth to help him or else the Boss will make his life miserable.

So, finally, the letter is done on 28^th of October 1988. The intern initials the letter on the left-hand side and the Boss signs his name in full on the right side and the same is sent to the complainant on 20^th of November as the Dak (Despatch) Department staff is on leave. It is post Durga Puja and the group is touring from Kashmir to Kanyakumari.

Life was good then. Look what we have made of it. I ,always, loved the ride on the Kolkata tram….it moved slowly, meandering its way from point to point at its own pace where you could jump in and jump out at any time…you even had the luxury of First Class travel at the cheapest possible price. It is so nice to read your novel….you could finish reading a short story travelling from Ballygunge to Sealdah…..and if reading was not your forte, you could watch the Maidan, the roads, the people and the old buildings…. or could simply take a nice siesta and not be disturbed. Sometimes, I just do not want to be the hare, I want to be the tortoise and yet not want to win the race.....

थोड़ा ठहर जा
थोड़ा सा रुक जा
आहिस्ता आहिस्ता चलने दे
दुनिया को थोड़ी सी देख ले
जल्दी किस बात की है तुझे
कौन सी मंज़िल पानी है तुझे
थोड़ा ठहर जा
थोड़ा सा रुक जा
थोड़ा संभल जा
थोड़ी सी सांस ले ले
ज़िन्दगी के कुछ लुत्फ़ ले ले
दो घडी तो जी ले
भागता , हाँफता कब तक फिरे
बचपन , जवानी सब हैं जा बिछड़े
अब लौट के ना आएंगे फिर
संभल जा , और न अब गिर
आहिस्ता आहिस्ता चलता चल
जी ले ज़िन्दगी के बचे हुए पल.

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