In My Anti-Hero Era

“I have this thing where I get older but just never wiser…” 

In 2009, I bought my first CD with the cover of a girl just a year older than myself with curls flying fearlessly. Night after night and several days in my dad’s car, this CD was a constant from the college friends’ favourite ‘You Belong with Me’ to my bedtime encores of ‘Superstar’ and ‘Untouchable’. I have been a Swiftie since 2010 and while I kept up with the most popular releases from ‘Shake it off’ and ‘Blank Space’ to ‘I Knew you were Trouble’ and ‘Lover’, it was not until COVID-19 that I realized her impact and how much of a Trouble she actually was. I believe that was her intention all along, for the mastermind that she is. But the motives aside, I started admiring her literary compositions, for I believe for me, she is a poet first and a pop star next. 

 “How's one to know? I'd meet you where the spirit meets the bones, in a faith forgotten land” 

I have always been vocal about how fiction can have a greater impact than the best and most awarded non-fiction. Fiction is after all real in a world that is not yours. It is an allegory, a satire, a fable or in a more contemporary way, altered or augmented reality. I still remember in school, my friends and I were quite fascinated by Linda Goodman. Disclaimer- this is neither fiction nor an indication of my life principles. But all in all, it used to be fun where you discovered how this author knew so much about you just from your sun sign. Retrospectively, it was just you relating your life events or personality traits to written words. Louisa May Alcott led us to believe that we would grow up to be strong, independent women like Meg, Jo, Beth or even Amy in our own way, with all our flaws. Tolkien’s ring is nothing but a symbol of unimaginable power in the wrong or right hands. Segal’s Love Story is not a fantasy. Hosseini’s sagas are a tribute to survivors and martyrs of all wars waged in the name of the Lord and Liberation. From Thomas Hardy to Dan Brown, authors have ultimately connected to the readers by defining or describing relatable emotions sometimes in known but often in unknown settings. And that is the mark of a good writer, to be able to communicate personally without uttering a word or knowing the audience at all. I also feel that that is what makes Taylor Swift’s music stand out. 

“I’ve never been a natural, all I do is try, try try” 

I write without basing any of this on her fan-theories, critical commentaries or her current popularity. I will not go into her public image over the years, or her economic powerplays. She is not the greatest of singers, and she may not have the best ‘music’ in different genres. But her versatility and creativity are undeniable. She has the ability to conjure every emotion with her skillfully crafted lyrics- happiness, falling in love, being in love, falling out of love, pain, despair, depression, desire, regret, reconciliation, remorse, loss, win, doubt, conviction, innocence, guilt, losing control, reclaiming control, hatred, jealousy, pride, shame, power, pain, recovery, death, friendship, trust, betrayal, hope, loneliness, camaraderie, hurt, acceptance, vulnerability, vindictiveness, introspection, retrospection and a lot more. She can mellifluously make a memorable impression with details in her songs with words and phrases that we use routinely- months of the year (August, September, December, July), seasons (summer, autumn, winter), time of the day (2:00, 3:00, 1:58, midnight, timeless), age (7, 15, 18, 19, 25, 32, 89), phases of life (childhood, teenage, young adults, adults, motherhood, old age), places (New York, Paris, London, India), life choices (leaving home, setting up a new home, pursuing a profession, turning down or accepting offers) and colours (red, maroon, blue, golden, grey, black). A lot of songs are complete stories often transporting the audience to different worlds, from castles and princesses to high school corridors, eerie moors to cozy living rooms, forgotten mansions to hospital rooms, hidden alleys to decked-up halls, quaint cafes to crowded bars, pine forests to churches. Students can probably learn more alliterations, similes, metaphors, onomatopoeia and antithesis and oxymorons from her lyrics than from textbooks. Apart from pop anthems and country ballads, some songs paint a vivid picture reminiscent of Austen's striking representation of ordinary people or Bronte's hauntingly beautiful imagery. 

“It was the end of a decade, but the start of an age” 

I happened to recently speak to a young girl bravely dealing with the school and entrance examinations. In her free time, she finds solace in Swift’s music. Several literary scholars acclaim her works. She can appeal to children and animate the aged. Having grown up with her, some of her older songs hit different now. I think it is the similar to appreciating Kishore Kumar or Tagore after a certain age or re-reading your favourite books after several years and developing a different kind of affinity for it. Shakespeare is hailed as a giant in literature, not because of complicated plots or intricate nature of his writings but because he could convey complex emotions through known situations which everybody, from aristocrats to common people could understand and enjoy. Swift, I feel, can weave a similar magic. It is as if with each song, she is talking about you, talking to you, or talking for you, even if you have never ever been and are unlikely to be in a similar situation. Sometimes she expresses thoughts which are lost in your head or frozen at the tip of your tongue. So, while she sings, “I can never bring you peace…”, she most certainly does. 

“I've never heard silence quite this loud” 

Today we are living in a world where criticism is the way of life, opinions are becoming more like orders, inclusivity is for the sake of being included, I for one prefer to hear someone say the same thing truthfully in better words like, “forcing laughter, faking smiles”. Is it wrong to want to escape? In an age when you must contemplate every word for it might be offensive to some stranger, and careful is the only way to be carefree, I would prefer to scream my lungs out, “I had the time of my life fighting dragons with you”, with a group of people who are united by love. Is it wrong to look for catharsis? At a time when your convictions hang on a precarious ledge and two negatives do not amount to a positive, I would want somebody to sing “your string of lights is still bright to me”. Is it wrong to seek support? 

“I want auroras and sad prose, I want to watch wisteria grow right over my bare feet” 

Yes, I will wish she wins all the awards, and I will make a mad rush for tickets if I ever get a chance. Yes, I will applaud her determination to re-record and own her music and yes, I will listen to all her songs even if they are not Taylor’s version because they have always been her versions! Call it what you want, the haters gonna hate, so if the shoe fits walk in it…and in a world full of cynics, I am proud to be a Swiftie!

MS